Why did the Jamaican basketball player always take tropical fruits to the games? Because he loved shooting pineapples and making ‘lime’ shots! After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. \ for me to accept this bottle you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million in the bank and 9 inches in your trousers.”

You hate to throw away empty containers as they might come in handy for pepper sauce or "green seasonings". What did the Jamaican man say when asked why he didn't mind going to jail for stealing the Pikachu card? Di Swiss diman watch yu did ask mi fa de pan Puncie lef wris and di tings dem wha yu did sen come beg mi for Mama (di earrings, ring and chain), dem is where dem suppose fi wear pon Puncie body, please tek dem before anybody come fi view di body. What did the Jamaican math teacher say to her students? “You can do reggae functions if you add a little rhythm!” Jamaica Me Punny!How many Jamaicans does it take to change a light bulb? None – they prefer the warm glow of the sun, mon! An elderly Jamaican man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite Jamaican pastry, ‘ Gizzada‘ wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Why did the Jamaican artist draw pictures of the beach? Because he wanted to capture the beauty of being in ‘sand’ and ‘scene’!”

Puncie a wear one dozen Wonder Bras (a fi mi favorite), jus devide dem mongst the likkle gal dem inna di district. Get ready for a Caribbean comedy experience with our Jamaican jokes. These hilarious one liners and clever wordplays will transport you to the Jamaican vibes, leaving you with a smile that’s as bright as the island’s sunshine. It’s a planet,” replied God, “and I’ve put Life on it. I’m going to call Earth and it’s going to be a great place of balance.” This Jamaican dude was taking a pee on the side of a building in Queens and this American sees him. I asked a Jamaican friend if he had any Jamaican spices. He replied, “I’ve got a whole lotta jerk!”Ah,” said God. “That’s Jamaica the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful beaches, blue mountains, streams, hills, and waterfalls. The people from Jamaica are going to be very handsome, modest, intelligent and humorous and they are going to be found traveling the world holding good jobs. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace, play football and go to the Winter Olympics.” I watched a Jamaican dance troupe perform an incredible routine. They would move, sway, then repeat the motion… it was a true “re-ggae-mimic-cycle.” Join us as we dive into the world of Jamaican humor, where the laughter flows like the rhythm of a steel drum! Jamaican Jokes Clean Why did the Jamaican plantain go to the doctor? It was “feeling-a-lil”-l yellow! Jamaican Jokes For Adults I went to Jamaica and realized I had a serious problem—everywhere I went, I was drawn to the jerk sauce. I guess you could say I was ‘sauce’-sexual.”

My girlfriend said I believe in you and it made me happy. But then I realised she had just affected a culturally inappropriate Jamaican accent to break the news that she was moving out. Why did the Jamaican man take his mattress to the beach? To sleep in comfort, mon! Jamaican Jokes And RiddlesIf you say the words 'beer can' in a British accent, it sounds like you're saying 'bacon' in a Jamaican accent. I entered a Jamaican cooking competition, but I couldn’t handle the pressure. I couldn’t take the heat in the kitchen, mon.” Humor and jokes play a very important role in the Jamaican culture. Here is a collection of Clean Jamaican Jokes submitted to us by visitors to Jamaicans.com. The Coffin How do Jamaican church members greet each other after service? “Irie, my brother/sister! See you in the next ‘irie’ service!”

Why was the Jamaican chef so beloved? Because he always added a little “spice” to everything he cooked!I got lost in a Jamaican marketplace, and a local vendor told me, ‘Mon, you need to get your bearings straight.'” A Jamaican man was ironing his shirt when his phone rang. Instead of answering the phone, he took up the iron and burnt off one of his ears. I noticed a Jamaican athlete practicing her high jump. She would leap, then jump again, until it became a “re-burry-iating” routine. There was a football match between colombia and Jamaica in 1967 It didn't go well, the Colombians sniffed all the white lines and Jamaicans smoked all the grass.